The Death of the God of Death
by Abinikai
Summary: This is just comedy. The God of Death dies in this in an unusual way. More chapters may be added on later. UPDATED AFTER YEARS! 05-23-04. Yaaay!
1. The Death of the God of Death

Hello! This is my first FanFic, so please review. I will not post any more chapters if you do not review, and I already have more chapters written out. PLEASE REVIEW. Have a nice day!  
  
Disclaimers: I do not own any Gundam Wing Characters, though a few of them I would like to own. If you know any way for me to have them, please tell! TTYL!  
  
  
  
  
  
The Death of the God of Death  
  
The 'Perfect Soldier' rolled over and moaned. "How do they expect me to BE a Perfect Soldier if I can't get a single night of good sleep?" Heero groaned to no one in particular. On the other side of the Gundam House, The God of Death, Duo Maxwell, was about to become the DEAD God of Death.  
  
Heero got up and took a cold shower. He got dressed in his regular blue jeans and a green muscle-T. He didn't bother combing his hair, though he did open his top drawer and pull out three or four assorted guns, arming himself very well. He walked out of the room and strutted down the hall, making sure that his favorite gun was ready and loaded.  
  
Heero walked the whole way to the kitchen listening to Duo's screams. "Woohoo!" Heero heard, along with "I got COFFEE! And it's named after ME! It's MY property! See it says "MAXWELL HOUSE! That's MY name, so it's MY coffee!" Heero could just imagine the sight in the kitchen right now. He was right.  
  
Heero walked into the kitchen, almost amazed that Wufei was putting up with being called 'Wu-man' by the all-too-hyper Shinigami (AN: Shinigami means 'God of Death'), but Heero hid his amazement well. Wufei was sitting in a chair by the kitchen table with Duo dancing around him and calling him Wu-man and other pet names. Releena was holding her head and shaking with suppressed laughter. Quatre and Trowa sat of to one side trying not to draw Duo's unwanted attention to them selves.  
  
No one noticed Heero walk into the room, but everyone (excluding Duo, who was literally bouncing of the walls, floor and ceiling screaming "Coffee!") froze when Heero pulled out his favorite gun (AN: You've all seen it: the one that he always uses to kill or threaten with, especially if he's trying to scare Releena).  
  
"Who gave baka coffee?" (AN: baka means stupid) said Heero quietly, though everyone in the room (except Duo, of course) heard. No one answered.  
  
Heero tried again. "Who gave baka COFFEE while I was trying to get some SLEEP?"  
  
Releena spoke up. "We would have been waking you up soon anyways, Heero."  
  
"Releena, what happened the last time you sent someone to wake Heero up?" said Quatre matter-of-factly.  
  
-FLASHBACK-  
  
A servant knocked on Heero's door. "Sir, it is time for you to wake up." When there was no answer, the servant opened the door quietly. He walked over to the bed and shook Heero gently. "Sir-"  
  
The manservant was cut off by Heero, who had grabbed the gun that he slept with by his side and pinned the man to the bed, pointing the gun strait in- between his eyes. "Never, NEVER try and wake me up again," Heero shouted at the man underneath his arms. The servant had nodded very quickly that he wouldn't and rushed out of the room. He quit that day.  
  
-END OF FLASHBACK-  
  
"Okay, so my servants wouldn't have gone near him to try and wake him up," admitted Releena. "We could have called the phone beside his bed." In the background, Duo was still bouncing off the walls. Everyone sweat dropped, while Wufei shoved the over-active Shinigami out of the room and shut the door.  
  
Trowa spoke up this time, talking over the muffled shouts of the indignant Duo on the other side of the door. "Remember the hotel incident, Princess?" That incident was still fresh on everyone's mind.  
  
-FLASHBACK-  
  
-Ring Ring-  
  
-Ring Ring-  
  
Heero moaned and rolled over. He picked up the phone, groaning his protest. From the other end of the line, a feminine voice kindly said, "Sir, this is your wake-up call."  
  
"What time is it?" groaned Heero in a groggy, sleep-filled voice.  
  
"Eight Thirty, Sir." Heero groaned again. He took out his gun, and with the phone dangling on its line, shot the window, then a porcelain lamp and finally the bathroom door before shooting the phone.  
  
-END OF FLASHBACK-  
  
The group winced at the thought of all the bills for the damaged and 'irreplaceable' items, plus the screaming desk clerk and immediately being kicked out.  
  
"It wasn't my idea to send a wake up call," said Releena defensively.  
  
"No," said Heero, "It was Duo's. Now, I repeat my question," suddenly Duo burst into the room, finding out that all he had to do was turn the doorknob to get in. Heero rolled his eyes and continued. "Who gave baka over there COFFEE?"  
  
Duo looked at Heero as if just noticing that he was in the room. "HEEE- ROOO!" shouted the God of Death.  
  
"Uh-oh." Said Releena. She ducked under the kitchen counter in the hopes that no one saw her. The other pilots did the same, taking cover where they could find it.  
  
Duo immediately started dancing around Heero shouting "I got COFFEE and YOU DON"T!" Duo started cackling evilly. The whole group sweat dropped again.  
  
Heero didn't take a moment to think. He aimed and fired at the God of Death, who immediately dropped to the floor after realizing that he was shot. Releena and Quatre immediately rushed over worried that Duo was dead. Trowa stood up, but stayed where he was with a look of concern on is face. Only Wufei had seen where Heero had aimed.  
  
Wufei, unable to hold it in any longer, burst out laughing, which was an unusual occurrence for the unemotional China Man, but no one noticed. Duo trembled slightly, which got the hopes of Releena and Quatre up.  
  
"It's—It's ALIVE!" shouted Quatre *lightning flashes and thunder booms in the Dr. Frankenstein kind of way* *everyone looks around*  
  
"What was that?" asked Releena.  
  
"Sorry, I couldn't resist," said Quatre apologetically. "I just had to say that."  
  
"It's okay," said Releena. "Now, back to Duo." Releena knelt at his side. "Duo, say something."  
  
Duo looked up at Releena, tears brimming in his eyes. "He…He…He shot my favorite coffee cup!" shouted Duo. Duo showed the whole room his favorite coffee cup, now shattered, which once read "The God Of Death," scrawled in Duo's untidy penmanship with a black permanent marker.  
  
Wufei started laughing, the second time on what was probably a decade. Then Heero joined in laughing, and finally everyone in the room except Duo (who was mourning his coffee cup) was rolling on the floor laughing.  
  
-later that day- 


	2. Idiot

Disclaimer: I own no one *pouts* Thank you for all the reviews!  
  
  
  
  
  
-later that day-  
  
Releena wanted to go shopping with the guys. Duo and Quatre had joined in enthusiastically, and Trowa only needed a little convincing. Heero and Wufei, on the other hand, needed a lot of convincing. Matter-of-fact, they had to be bribed.  
  
Ah, come one Heero," whined Duo. "You gotta come to the mall with us!" Duo was trying to convince Heero, while Quatre and Releena were working on Wufei, and Trowa sat in a corner doing nothing.  
  
"No," said Heero firmly. "I will not be seen in public with you."  
  
"I won't bother you for the rest of the day," taunted Duo. Heero was immediately listening. Duo secretly crossed his fingers behind his back, hoping that Heero wouldn't kill him anytime soon.  
  
"All right, but you have to leave me alone ALL DAY." Heero thought a moment, and then childishly said "No finger crossing counts." Duo sighed inwardly as his plan failed. But then, there was always the back up plan. All Gundam pilots had a back up plan, and when it came to annoying people, Duo had at least forty back up plans.  
  
Duo promised that he wouldn't bother either Heero or Wufei the rest of the day as long as they both came to the mall. Of course, while he was promising he wouldn't annoy them, he was also staring strait into Heero's favorite gun. What better way is there to extract a promise from Duo than to set Heero in front of him with a loaded gun and threaten the promise out of him? Then again, even while he was being threatened with a loaded gun, his toes were crossed and hidden underneath his shoes, which no one was looking at.  
  
At the mall, Releena and the four of the Gundam Pilots that were sane claimed that they had never met the insane Duo Maxwell. Most people didn't believe then, as Duo was shouting "Hey Everybody, meet all my friends!" and dancing around the five sane people with a joy of life. He was still very hyper from coffee, and the fact that Quatre had consented to buying Duo a coke to make him shut up wasn't helping. The coke had obviously not worked.  
  
When Duo was reminded of his promise, Duo replied, "You said no finger crossing. I crossed my toes." Duo smirked happily as an exasperated Heero added that to the list of banning Duo from doing while making him promise things. Heero fingered where he usually had his favorite gun, right in his pocket, wishing Releena wasn't so persuasive.  
  
-FLASHBACK-  
  
"Heero, you'll hurt somebody with your guns if you take them!" pleaded Releena.  
  
"But that is the whole point," muttered Heero under his breath while placing his guns and ammo on the kitchen table, glancing sideways at the over-active God of Death, who was still bouncing of the walls.  
  
-END OF FLASHBACK-  
  
Heero let out a long sigh as the party of six walked into their favorite store, Spencer's. Heero walked over to the fake credit card section and started browsing. He read cards like "You say bitch as if it's a bad thing" and "This official card gives me permission to annoy ANYONE and EVERYONE that I want to annoy." Duo needed a card like that, but Heero wasn't about to show it to him. Then Heero picked up and black and white card. He read the card, flipped it over and read it again. Heero smile evilly, and went up to the front desk to but his evil card.  
  
-Five Minutes Later…-  
  
Duo, I got you a present. The God of Death bounced up to him, joyful. The rest of the gang looked at Heero oddly. Heero never got Duo ANYTHING. No one asked questions for fear of the actions that Heero may take, but they were all curious. Heero flipped the card to the over happy pilot, smirking like he had just bombed a whole space station or something.  
  
Duo read the front of the card, black with white writing on it. He mumbled the words out loud to himself, but no one could understand him. Heero just sat there smirking contentedly, as if he hadn't a care in the world. He seemed very happy with himself, and he was.  
  
Duo flipped the card over and over, trying to figure out what the card meant. On one side the card was black with white writing, and on the other side t was vice-versa. Duo kept flipping it over and over, not able to figure it out. The group walked on, window-shopping. Everyone expect Duo looked at the items for sale. Duo was absorbed in his card, not caring what was going on around him. He just followed the group.  
  
-Ten Minutes Later…-  
  
Duo was still turning his card over and over, mumbling the words out loud to him self. People gave him odd looks, including the rest of Duo's friends. Everyone, except Heero, was dumbfounded by what had gotten Duo so absorbed. Heero just cracked up laughing every so often, and anyone who gave him a single odd glance got the famous Death Glare TM from Heero, and they would quickly hurry on there way.  
  
-In the car, more than two hours later…-  
  
Duo turned his card over. He read the card. He turned it over again, and read the card again. He had been looking at the same card for over two hours now, and it was starting to make the others very curious. So curious that they were trying to read it over his shoulder or ask him what it said, but Duo would just keep on turning the card over, hunched so far over it that no one could read it but him.  
  
The group was starting to get worried, as the God of Death didn't even care for Chocolate Ice Cream, but just sat nibbling at it, still turning the card over in one hand. Finally Duo gave up.  
  
"I give up!" shouted Duo for everyone to hear. "I wanna know what'll keep an Idiot busy for hours!" Duo flung the card across the room where it hit the wall and stayed there, creating a crack in the wall and a few appalled looks at Duo, who had just cracked the wall with a plastic card. Duo slumped in his chair and pouted, pulling his baseball cap over his eyes.  
  
The rest of the group ran headlong for the wall, trying to pull the card out and read it. Heero just sat back in his chair and laughed his head off. None of them cared about the weird glances being thrown at them. Wufei was the first to get the card and read it. He read the white side first, flipped it over and read the black side, then threw it to the nearest person as he cracked up laughing for the third time in what must have been more than a decade.  
  
Pretty soon the whole group that had dived for the card was rolling on the floor laughing, the card lying forgotten in Quatre's hands. Quatre dropped the card as he clutched his stomach in laughter. The card lay on the floor, black side up. Heero went to go pick it up, reading it once more.  
  
It read:  
  
If You would like to Know how to Keep an  
  
Idiot busy for Hours, Turn this card over.  
  
On the other side it read:  
  
If You would like to Know how to Keep an  
  
Idiot busy for Hours, Turn this card over.  
  
Heero smirked as he commended himself on his good thinking. He knew that Maxwell was an Idiot, and the card would keep Duo busy for hours. Duo was still trying to figure out why everyone was laughing so hard, when Heero flung the card back at him.  
  
"Here you go, Idiot." Heero smirked and walked out of the ice cream shop they had been in. The rest of the group followed quickly, and they all went home for the rest of the day. 


	3. Revenge

All standard Disclaimers apply  
  
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That night, Duo had finally figured out the idiot card. He had been pretty mad, and had gone to bed almost instantly. He lay in bed thinking of what a moron he had been portrayed as, on the verge of tears for a long time. Then Duo started thinking. An evil smile formed on his face, growing wider as the time passed.  
  
Soon the whole group was in bed, asleep. All, that is, except for Duo. He sat straight up in bed thinking hard. No one noticed him. A mouse scurried across the floor, darting behind the bureau to what was probably his home. Watching the mouse gave Duo another idea. Duo quietly got up and roamed around the house, executing his plans which NO ONE knew about.  
  
*the next morning*  
  
Heero came awake slowly. Still half asleep, he checked his clock. 9:30. He NEVER got to sleep that late because the Maxwell idiot was always being his loud and obnoxious self. Heero sat straight up, suddenly awake. Was the Maxwell Idiot gone? No, that was too good to be true. But something was amiss.  
  
Heero got up and took a brisk shower, and then went to brush his teeth. The bathroom was very steamy and the mirror was fogged. He squirted a little toothpaste onto his toothbrush, and ran the cold water over it. He noticed that the toothpaste was foaming slightly. Heero looked over the slight difference and brushed his teeth. Heero walked out of the bathroom to get dressed, finished with his teeth.  
  
Heero opened up his top drawer and gasped. Everything was—PINK. Many of the shirts had "Prince" or some other remark printed across it. He opened the rest of the drawers with the same results, and then rushed to the closet to find the same thing. Heero couldn't go out dressed in pink, but he owed no PJ's (he slept in the nude) (AN: sorry, I couldn't think of any way around him having no other color clothes). The only thing NOT pink that Heero wore often was his smiley and flower printed boxer pants, and he didn't want anyone to know that he had a soft side!  
  
Heero debated, and then went out in the only other thing not pink. A yellow shirt with the words "Manly" printed across the front that Duo had givin him and Heero refused to wear. At least his jeans were not pink…but then again, Heero didn't look at the back of his jeans.  
  
Heero walked into the kitchen, fuming. The moment Wufei looked up, he dropped the glass plate he was carrying to the table and let his mouth drop, showing another spasm of unusual emotion or surprise. The plate crashing on the floor made the rest of the room look up, and respond in a similar way. The only one who showed emotion other than surprise was Duo, who was ecstatic that Heero was wearing the shirt Duo had givin him.  
  
Heero, who was beginning to turn red, stared at everyone in the room, and then said quietly, "Not a word. You have no CLUE what happened to my dresser." The people in the room, who were about to ask questions, shut their mouths in a wise response, especially since they had seen something that Heero obviously hadn't. Even his teeth were pink, which Heero hadn't been able o see because the only mirror in his room was in his bathroom, which had been fogged up, though no one else knew that.  
  
Heero sat down and got out his tea. His tea was special—no one drank out of it, prepared it or even TOUCHED it other then Heero, until now. Heero poured himself a glass and sat down with a bagel to his late morning breakfast. His first sip of tea was a disaster. He spat it out over the table, and then looked up into the surprised faces in the room.  
  
"Who put soap in my tea?" asked Heero. He was NOT having a good day. Not even Duo would succumb him to a pink morning with soapy tea! (AN: Or would he?) Heero got up and got a glass of water. He sat down and finished his breakfast without another interruption. Inside, Duo was laughing hysterically, though he showed no emotion otherwise, and inside, the other Gundam characters were thinking: Duo.  
  
When Heero got up to leave the room, Duo could not suppress a simple, "Heero, have you looked at your pants lately?" Heero immediately looked at the back of his pants, which sported bright pink hearts and "I love you" in bold black on each cheek. Heero stormed out of the room, face red. He went straight to Wufei's closet and picked out the most sensible thing Wufei owned, a pair of kaki pants and a white tank. Heero then went shopping promptly.  
  
While shopping, Heero thought on who would be so cruel as to change his clothes and soap his tea. The only thing coming to mind was Duo, but Duo wouldn't stoop so low as that! Then Heero remembered what had happened yesterday. Heero immediately rethought everything and came to the conclusion that Duo was behind all of this. But how to avoid the pranks, and get back at Duo at the same time?  
  
When Heero got home he was dressed in his new clothes (a pair of jeans and a green tank). He noted Duo's smug look when he walked into the room, Wufei's clothes in a grocery bag. Heero went to his room immediately upon returning Wufei's clothes. Soon after, he took the other items in his Wal- mart (AN: Wal-mart ROCKS) shopping bag and went to his room. Only Wufei saw him.  
  
Duo jumped out of the shower and rubbed his body dry. He threw on some clothes and opened the door to go out of his room. Duo screamed "What the—"  
  
Duo walked into the kitchen, covered in shaving cream. "What happened to you?" asked Releena.  
  
"Heero placed a can of shaving cream outside my w=room and rigged it to spray when I opened the door." Duo pouted, and a small dab of shaving cream ran down his forehead.  
  
"What makes you say it was Heero?" asked Quatre.  
  
"For one look at him," said Duo, who was glaring at Heero. Heero was chuckling, trying to keep his face emotionless. He wasn't succeeding. "And also, the sign on the wall behind the can of shaving cream said 'Compliments of the person wearing pink earlier.'"  
  
"Oh," said Quatre. "Okay."  
  
It was war, and none of the other Gundam pilots wanted to get involved. Heero and Duo were playing pranks on each other left and right. Most of the Gundam pilots stayed in the kitchen, venturing to the bathroom rarely because Heero and Duo had rigged the place so well. Even with those precautions, a very disturbed Wufei came back to the kitchen with bright yellow and pink spray paint all over his white fighting outfit (AN: you know, the one he's almost ALWAYS wearing). No one said anything, and Wufei just sat down in the nearest chair, not daring even to venture to his room to get a change of clothes.  
  
Releena had an idea. She gathered the pilots around her and whispered… "Okay, what we do is—"  
  
Heero was walking down the hallway, very cautious of the fact there would be traps everywhere. He passed one of his own traps (a bunch of balloons filled with water ready to drop the moment a set of sensors detected Duo's presence) and avoided it. Then he saw a curious sign—it said 'I give up. Meet me in the kitchen.' Duo saw the same sign less then a minute later.  
  
Heero was sitting in the unoccupied kitchen. No one was there, with was a little odd. Less than a minute later, Duo walked into the room. Duo asked, "Do you wanna make up, or somethin'?"  
  
"Not really, but I wanted to hear what you had to say."  
  
"What do you mean, what I had to say? I didn't make that sign!" said Duo.  
  
"Then who did?" asked Heero.  
  
At that exact moment, the two Gundam pilots in the middle of the room were bombarded with silly string, whipped cream, shaving cream, water and anything else you can think of. They were tied up by people whose faces were not seen, and put in chairs where more ropes and chains were fastened to them. Heero, for once in his life, was almost surprised.  
  
Once the commotion died down (Heero and Duo were thoroughly tied up), the capturers were finally seen. It was the other four people who inhabited the house, Releena, Quatre, Wufei and Trowa. They all had very smug looks on their faces. Even Wufei was showing content.  
  
"Now," said Quatre. "Either you disarm all of your traps, play no more pranks, and make up, or we cut off Duo's braid and put permanent make up on Heero." For once in Quatre's life, he was taking command and being cruel at the same time. He was not his usual loving, caring, kind, sweet hearted self, but he was a mean and cruel figure.  
  
Duo and Heero were suddenly paying attention. They quickly apologized. Then the four people teamed up and escorted each of the pranksters while they disarmed their pranks and traps (Releena and Wufei escorting Duo, Quatre and Trowa escorting Heero).  
  
Once all of the traps were disarmed, the whole gang rested in the kitchen (Heero and Duo glaring at each other across the table). The other four were glad that it was all over, and they could walk down the halls without being afraid of walking into a trap. Quatre went to the bathroom, walking casually. Suddenly six eggs came flying at him, five of which landed on him. "DUO! HEERO!" yelled Quatre.  
  
In the kitchen, Duo winced. "Opps. I knew I forgot one." Everyone in the room cracked up laughing, and when Quatre walked into the room, so did he.  
  
**Thanks for all of your reviews! They have been really fun to read, and have sort of helped create this chapter. A special thanks to for helping me get the idea. In your review, you said that Duo was not the idiot I portrayed him to be, and I agree, he isn't. It sparked an idea for this chapter. Thank you all for R&R. I am very sorry that I have not been posting lately—I have been very busy. I did not think I would even be able to post a chapter this week! Have a nice day!  
  
Abi. 


	4. A Dangerous Team

Heero slipped a note under Duo's door. He could hear Duo get up to read it, and then Heero went back to his room to wait. He didn't have to wait long. A moment later, a soft, cautious knock was heard on his door. Heero silently opened the door and invited The God of Death into the room.  
  
"How do you want to do this?" asked Duo in a controlled whisper, afraid someone would hear him, but unable to suppress the large smile on his face.  
  
"I just want...revenge," said Heero.  
  
"Okay, so my idea for..." Their voices came more hushed as they planned. All throughout the night they sat up and talked. At one in the morning, Duo went back into his room, planning to be quiet and normal in the morning. Heero did the same.  
  
**That Morning**  
  
Duo yawned, stretching his arms out as far as they would go. Suddenly he remembered the plans made last night and smiled. He got out of bed, put on his most annoying grin and threw on some clothes. He breathed in deeply and went out of the room to be an annoying Shinigami.  
  
Duo walked into the kitchen and went strait for the coffee, and evil grin planted on his face. He quietly snuck the coffee out of the room and got some for himself, and then quietly snuck it back to its original place. He then sat at the table with Relena and three other gundam pilots (Heero wasn't to wake up for another thirty minutes) and drank his coffee. With exactly five minutes of the original thirty left, he started bouncing off the walls, just like he would do any morning. Wufei sighed.  
  
"Who gave you coffee this morning, baka?" Wufei sweat dropped when Duo patted Wufei on the head like a dog and said that he got it for himself.  
  
`Only a moment...' thought Duo to himself. As if on cue, Heero walked into the room with a grumpy attitude. He was too awake to have been up only a few minutes, but no one noticed. Heero complained about Duo and coffee, and how they don't mix--ever, but no one listened because they had heard this speech one too many times. Inside, Duo was bursting with laughter, and Heero was as well.  
  
When everyone in the house had dispersed, whether it was to go shopping, to a jog, taking care of some business, or what ever they wanted to do, Heero and Duo started working. They went shopping at Wal-mart (AN: Wal-mart is my favorite place to shop; they have everything I need, so I had to include it), and actually agreed on things, except for the bright pink shirt Duo wanted to get for Heero. Heero had enough of pink to last in four lifetimes, and more, and Duo found that out with a dark bruise on his arm.  
  
Once Heero and Duo were to the check out counter, Duo was cracking up laughing, and Heero couldn't suppress a smile--a very BIG smile. They went home, and since no one was back yet, they got as far with their plans as they could without giving them away. Now all they had to do was wait till nightfall--the most dangerous time for anyone on the bad side of the God of Death and the Perfect Soldier.  
  
**That evening**  
  
Quatre and the other pilots were tired--a little too tired for how early it was (9:00) in the evening. Along with their many items, Heero and Duo had bought an untraceable, dissolvable sleeping powder in each of the drinks of the four other inhabitants of the Gundam house. Each of the pilots went to bed within 30 minutes of each other, Wufei being the last of them to go.  
  
Heero and Duo went to work as soon as every person could be heard snoring loudly. Then Duo went and got the stashed Wal-mart bags. They met in the living room--the closest victim was the Wu-man, as Duo called him.  
  
The dangerous team snuck quietly into Wufei's room with the first of many bags. Duo quietly got out the spray paint, silly string, and make up. First Duo, the expert at makeup, and Heero took the silly string. Duo made the Wu-man look like a Wu-girl, while Heero sprayed silly string on the inside of all of Wufei's shoes and clothes. Then Heero took the spray paint and wrote on a big box in big, bold letters "ONLY WEAKLINGS WEAR MAKE-UP AND LOOK LIKE GIRLS!" Heero then arranged the box in front of Wufei's mirror, so that he couldn't see his reflection immediately. All the while, Duo was applying waterproof make up to Wufei's face.  
  
Then the two went into Quatre's room. First they spilled the contents of seven Wal-mart bags. In it were black clothes, a man with a hatchet, fake blood, another body, and a tape with evil laughter on it. Duo and Heero arranged the bodies (the man with the hatchet and the `other body') so that they hatchet man was hovering over the other body. Heero squirted fake blood all over the other body, which was lying on the floor, and all over the end of the hatchet. The black clothes adorned the man with the hatchet. The tape of was set on the floor, ready to play at the push of a button (or a remote, if necessary).  
  
Next the duo (AN: ignore the pun) went into Trowa's room. They had a hard time thing of a prank to play on this unemotional person, but they had thought up something good. They spilled the contents of two four bags; they held four Barbies, pink spray paint, a Barbie tape and a life-size Barbie assembly (it was carried in without a bag). They set everything up; taking the Barbies out of their boxes and arranging them at the foot of the bed, spray painting a sign that said "BARBIE RULES" on it, and they put the tape in the tape player, ready to be played.  
  
Next it was on to Relena's room. Heero took the last of the bags into her pink and fuzzy, peace filled room. First, Duo took down all of the posters and items of peace and replaced them with things of War. Then Heero took his picture and placed it on his pillow with the words on it "I will kill you." Duo replaced her nice clothes with baggy and awful clothes. It was too easy to do with the sleeping princess zonked out (AN: sleeping for all of you dimwits). Then Heero put water balloons above Relena's bed so that when she sat up, she would be soaked.  
  
After Relena, Heero and Duo put water balloons above the rest of the sleeping victims, and started the music that needed to be played. Then Heero and Duo put on some refining touches on the rooms. In example, they put shaving cream and silly string in the shoes, hid all of the clothes except under wear, locked all of the doors to the rooms with a lock that needed a key, and hid the key somewhere in the room. They left little notes that read: "To get out of the room, find a key." Then they sat and waited, hidden from view in the camera room.  
  
It didn't take long. Wufei, instead of taking time to find the key, kicked the door down, and when Trowa couldn't find the key after twenty minutes, he kicked the door down as well. Quatre, who wasn't as violent, looked for the key for three hours, before resorting to screaming for help, just like Relena was doing from her room. Relena, hoarse, finally stopped screaming for help, but Wufei knocked her door down any way. Trowa knocked Quatre's door down. Then the four went on a hunt for the culprits. Since they never found them, they went back to bed, locking the doors tightly.  
  
Heero and Duo quietly sneaked back to their rooms. Before they left each other's company, they gave a high-five and burst out laughing. It had been a good day.  
  
**Hey all of you out there. Sorry this is so short. I had writer's block, and couldn't think of what to write. Thank you for your reviews. They were great fun to read. *sweat drops* Sorry, I couldn't post. I haven't had a whole lot of free time, but I'm on winter break now *does happy dance*, so I will be able to write and post more. But, on the other hand, I am having writer's block, so the chapters won't come that fast. Please, if you have an idea for me, I would be glad to take it and make a new story. Thanks. Have a nice day.  
  
Abi.  
  
P.S. And a special thanks to Battousai (), who helped spark an idea for this chapter. 


	5. Relena's gone insane

Okay, it's not the same as my other chapters. Matter of fact, I think its boring, but I couldn't think of anything else to write. It's kind of predictable, and I don't like it, but here's my next chapter. Thanks.  
  
Disclaimer: I wrote it before; I'll say it again if it will mean I don't get sued. I don't own GW!!!  
  
Relena didn't want to be herself. Her life was fun, but she needed a change. Relena remembered something she had passed a while back, something that would definitely give her a change. She would have a change, and no one would need to know what she was doing, and most importantly of all, no one would treat her all high and mighty like they usually did.  
  
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Heero was worried about Relena. She wasn't acting like her happy little annoying self. Even though he didn't show it willingly, Heero did care for Relena. Almost to the point of loving her, but not quite. And Relena didn't seem to get enough time to herself, and even less time with other people treating her like a real person. She seemed overloaded with work, and every one treated her like royalty. She was royalty, but they didn't need to treat her like that all the time, and she hated it.  
  
Heero wanted to do something for his friend, but he didn't know what. He would have to think on it.  
  
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It was dinner at the Sanq Palace, and Relena was late. She wasn't very late, only a few minutes, but it was noticeable. Suddenly she burst through the door, panting slightly and a little red in the face.  
  
"Sorry I'm late," said Relena after she caught her breath. "Meeting ran late." Everyone took this excuse without complaint. Meetings often ran late when it came to Relena's affairs.  
  
'It's okay," said the ever-forgiving Quatre. "It's not like our food is cold or anything." Duo made a pretend grimace at the thought of cold pizza. It was his staple food! He had it almost every day for lunch or dinner. Why would anyone care if it were cold? That was the way it was best!  
  
During dinner, Heero observed something strange. There was a large black fake feather sticking to Relena's red shirt. Duo saw this at the same time.  
  
"Relena," asked Duo, "Are you secretly a bird or something, 'cause there's a feather on your shirt. Everyone looked at Relena, and observed the large black fake feather. Relena turned bright red, Wufei snickered, muttering something about weaklings and black feathers, Quatre raised an eyebrow, Trowa remained emotionless though thoroughly curious, and everyone else, like Zechs and Noin, cracked up laughing.  
  
"Well I wonder where that came from?" asked Relena nervously. Heero made a mental note to check on it later.  
  
"After dinner, Heero silently followed Relena to her room. When she was about to go in, he asked, "What was with the feather, Rel?" Heero used his nickname for her when they were in private—never in public, though. It was his nickname, and anyways, he didn't want any of the others to make fun him because he was supposed to be the emotionless, perfect soldier.  
  
"Nothing Heero. I have no clue where it came from," said Relena, who was still nervous. "On second thought, I think this lady brushed up against me while I was rushing to get here, and I think she was wearing a black feathered boa. Yeah, I think that was it."  
  
"You lie."  
  
'No, that's what happened."  
  
"Whatever. I'll find out sooner or later."  
  
"I know." Once Heero got the response he wanted, he turned and went to his room. Relena, shaking from the close encounter, went to take a cold shower and go to bed.  
  
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The next day, Heero saw a nervous Relena talking with a few people he had never seen before. Taking a look around, he slipped quietly in to the bushes unseen and inched to where he could hear and see Relena, but not vice versa.  
  
"No one followed you, right?" asked Relena.  
  
"Right Ms. Peacecraft," said the first young girl, who seemed the most confident.  
  
Relena turned to the second girl, who was a little less confident. "And you'll be able to fill in for me tonight, right?" asked Relena. The girl looked remarkably like Relena, and if Heero didn't know Relena better, he might have mistaken her for Relena, had he not seen the girl standing next to his friend. The girl's makeup was probably professionally done.  
  
"Yes ma'am. And tomorrow as well."  
  
"Good, good. Now where's my stuff? I must be going." The first girl handed Relena a bag of things. Relena checked what was in the bag, and the group dispatched. Heero though he saw a black thing with feathers on top.  
  
Needless to say, Heero decided to secretly follow Relena.  
  
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After going down many alleyways and streets, Relena stopped outside the back of a small pub, talked with the young man there, and was let inside. Heero walked up to the man, and when he wasn't let in, Heero got a little drastic (as usual) and used his gun to convince the young man to let him in. He was let in with no further conflict.  
  
Inside, the place wasn't very interesting. The walls were drab, and the paint was peeling off. Outside, Heero could hear a faint singing that quickly ended before he could see what it was. He found a small, obscure door with a small sign that read "To the Audience." After walking through the door, he ended up in a small dingy pub. There were few people sitting in the chairs and booths scattered through out the dim room. It was clean, but there wasn't much to look at. The people weren't talking much, and the bartender looked tired and frail. The nurses bustled about in their dingy little uniforms to the different tables, all tired and worn out, but not showing it obviously. Heero took an obscure seat in the back of the room and waited.  
  
Soon the room went almost pitch black, except for a blue spotlight on a tiny stage. The moth-eaten curtains shuddered and drew back, revealing a slim girl on stage. On closer inspection, the girl was—Relena. She was wearing a brown wig done up in a large bun on top of her head. She had in colored contacts, though at this distance Heero couldn't quite tell what color they were. She was wearing a tight, form fitting short red dress that definitely looked good on her. Not to mention the black boa draped around her shoulders. You couldn't tell she was a person in disguise unless you knew her and saw her often.  
  
Then a voice came from somewhere off stage and said in a heavy southern accent, "Hey ya'll, this is Jennifer with a great song by Lee Ann Womack, I Hope you Dance. Hope ya enjoy." (A/N: sorry, I had it stuck in my head, and it's a great song, and I couldn't think of any other songs except for the corny ones my brother listens to!)  
  
Then Relena started singing. The microphone crackled a little, but it was still a great performance. Her voice drifted around the room like an angels voice, and the beauty of it mesmerized the whole room. Even Heero was awed—it may not be in the best place, it was kind of right for the situation and the moment. It was probably the best performance the small pub ever had, and one of the best performances Heero had ever seen.  
  
Once the performance was over, the curtains closed (with a little trouble), and Heero decided that he should get out of the place before Relena had a chance to catch him there. He made it home quickly, only got lost once, and laughed the whole way there. It was hilarious the measures Relena was taking to get away from her life. On the way home, Heero pondered on how he could use this as great blackmail. He forgot to look at the name of the pub before he left.  
  
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The next day, Heero deliberately hummed a few bars of the song around Relena. She seemed nervous, and asked Heero why he was humming the song. She knew that he acted a little more relaxed around her when they were alone, but he never hummed or sang. She asked him where he heard the song and why he was humming it, but his only answer was, "Hn." When he got out of earshot, he burst out laughing. Her face was priceless!  
  
Later, Heero asked again about the boa. She answered the same, but Relena acted more nervous. She knew he was on to her, but she couldn't ask about it because there were twenty other people standing around her. When Heero asked where Relena was the last night, she responded even more nervously, "A meeting."  
  
Heero saw a chance and took it. "Why didn't we hear of this meeting? And what was the meeting about?" Suddenly everyone stopped what he or she was doing to listen to Relena's response.  
  
"I…didn't think you needed to know about it." Relena was about to break down and cry, but she couldn't lose her composure, so she stuck out her chin and tried to look confident. She almost succeeded…almost. "It…was about some students attending my school…they were acting poorly, and I needed to talk to their parents." Relena was wringing her hands, though she attempted to cover her nervousness.  
  
"Alright." Heero pretended to take this for an answer, and went back to what he was doing with an uncaring manner. Everyone took this as he believed her, and so they all believed her too. It was fun to manipulate her like this.  
  
This time, it was Relena who followed Heero to his room to ask questions. "Alright, what do you know?"  
  
"Know what, Rel?"  
  
"You know that I sing at a Karaoke bar, don't you. Heero, please don't tell."  
  
"You're right. I followed you last night. It was really funny. Good performance, by the way."  
  
"Thanks," said Relena dryly.  
  
"Don't worry. I won't prolong your agony. I won't tell a soul. Instead, I'll keep it as blackmail."  
  
"Oh thanks," said Relena sarcastically.  
  
"Night Rel." Heero turned and went into his room, shutting the door in Relena's face. Relena almost started crying, but held her face and went back to her room and stubbornly went into bed without shedding a tear, though it was hard. She wasn't going to have her secret island any longer.  
  
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The next day, Heero didn't say a thing about the Karaoke bar. Relena had hope that he wouldn't tell. She had another performance tonight. She confronted Heero when they were alone, and asked him not to tell. He assured her that he wouldn't He affectionately ran his hand along her chin, and gave her a friendly kiss on the cheek. He knew he controlled her because she liked him, and she knew it would drive her crazy that he just did that, but he enjoyed teasing her. It was very affective when he wanted something, and he wanted to see her perform again. She couldn't stop him coming.  
  
He couldn't come tonight, though, because the Gundam pilots had a 'night out' like they had every month. They tried to have it on a specific day, but sometimes they had missions and couldn't do anything about it. On last Saturday, the day it had been arranged for, there had been a mission for Trowa and Quatre, so they couldn't have it. It really pained Heero when they had to post pone it because it usually got in the way of things, but there was nothing he could do about it. He didn't even want to go, but if he didn't the others would be mad, and he didn't want to put up with a mad annoying Duo like he had to put up with last month when he skipped out on the dinner.  
  
Later that night, they were discussing where they wanted to go. Duo mentioned a small Karaoke bar he wanted to go to. Heero figured that it was a different one then the one Relena was going to, so he went ahead and agreed. He didn't want to spend the whole night arguing about where to go.  
  
Heero was wrong. They drove up to the same Karaoke bar Relena was singing at. Heero recognized it the moment he saw it. He almost shouted out to turn the car around, but that would only make Duo and the others want to go there more.  
  
They walked in and took one of the seats right up next to the stage. Heero looked around nervously. Maybe Relena had already preformed. He hoped so, but he knew that wasn't the case. A blue spotlight on the dingy curtains that were now opening and a quick glance to see who was sitting on stage confirmed his worst suspicions. There was Relena.  
  
He tried to distract the others. He fell out of his seat and stood up in front of the table, dusting himself off. He acted embarrassed—anything to distract the Gundam boys. He heard the announcer say "Hey ya'll. Here's that beautiful girl Jennifer with the beautiful song I Hope you Dance. His ploy did not work. Duo just laughed at Heero. Then he saw who was on stage.  
  
"RELENA!" shouted Duo at the top of his lungs. Relena stopped mid song and stared at what happened. She sighed and jumped off stage.  
  
"Hey Duo. Its okay Heero." Relena took off her wig and let her hair fall down to her shoulders. The whole room went silent to see the famous Relena Peacecraft standing in front of them at a dingy pub in the middle of nowhere. "I've been coming here to get away from the work. I've had people filling in for me at meetings. I've come here to get away from stress and sing. Sorry for not telling you. I didn't want to ruin it."  
  
Duo burst out laughing. The rest of the room hesitantly chuckled. They didn't see the humor in this, like Duo and the others, who had also started laughing. Relena smiled. "I'm kind of glad you know now, even though I can't do this anymore."  
  
The next day there was an article in the newspaper about "Famous Peacecraft sings in Dingy Bar." Relena didn't care. The bar, though, suddenly became popular, though Relena never showed up anymore. Relena donated a small amount to the bar, and the owners took it to fix up the place. Relena was invited to visit to see the changes, which she did go see, but not when she was invited. She didn't want all the news press bothering her. She visited under disguise, but she told the owners who she was. She loved to new look. It was bright, and a small plaque above the counter thanked "Ms. Relena Peacecraft. A.K.A., Jennifer West." 


	6. Hike, anyone?

Okay, okay. I got bored. Unbelievably bored. So, while reading some of my old reviews, I got the idea into my head that it would be fun to make another "Death of the God of Death" chapter...but I still couldn't come up with any ideas...then I remembered some of my real-life experiences...and once I had modified them a bit, changed the names so that no one would be hurt and wrote it up, I had another chapter. Isn't that cool? Please note that I haven't written on this story in quite a long (and I mean long) while, so if my style has changed in any way (and I'm sure it has), blame it on my laziness to actually take the effort to make the styles the same. On with the story!

PS--I was too lazy to get it beta'd or spell checked or go back over in any way, so ignore all my mistakes. Just be happy with it being updated after a few years of inactivity. Not that you're reading this after so long anyways...you probably all stopped looking for updates years ago...literally.

* * *

Well...this was not Heero's idea of a fun excursion. Matter-of-fact, it wasn't Heero's idea of a fun _anything_. If asked, he would have preferred to kiss Wufei...and that wouldn't happen for another million years. Or two million. Or even eternity. Maybe when the world ended...but that was beside the point.  
  
"What on god's good planet, Relena, gave you the idea that this would be fun?" complained Heero. Here they were, after a two hour ride with heavy hiking packs that no one wanted to carry, and they were about to embark on a week-long hiking trip.  
  
"I heard that it was a very good bonding experience."  
  
"Where? What book did you get this from? _How to Kill Your Friends and Not be Blamed_? Or maybe _Idiot's Guide to Torturing your Friends_."  
  
"Actually, it was _The Best Way to Friendship_." Of course, Relena would be the one to miss the obvious sarcasm in Heero's voice, but that was to be understood...she was Relena, after all.  
  
"I have to agree with Heero-kun," whined Duo in a plaintive voice. "I don't wanna hike!"  
  
"Weaklings," muttered Wufei, who was shouldering his hundred-pound pack as if it was a hand bag. "At least this is a real challenge." Trowa didn't say anything, and Quatre never complained about anything...well, that anyone knew about, anyways.  
  
"Come on, it's time to go."  
  
"Uh...Relena...don't you think we should have a guide or something? Someone who's actually hiked before, you know. Someone who won't get us lost...?" questioned Quatre after a moment. "A map would be nice, too."  
  
"Who needs a map?" asked Wufei. "Maps are for weaklings."  
  
And so, they embarked on their journey. First it was a gravel road, and the trail branched off from that. Then it was a four day hike...and they were done.  
  
Heero looked up the gravel road with disgust. "We have to hike _up_ that? How...fun..." Relena nodded enthusiastically and started off, the adrenaline pumping through her helping her to carry her pack up the hill. "Great..." muttered Heero. He finally resigned himself to going up.  
  
Too bad that he was about fifty feet behind with Duo...and when the rest of the group turned off, they didn't see it.  
  
"Heero...this looks like the place where we're supposed to turn off. It's on the left, like Relena said."  
  
Heero shook his head and sighed. A week with Duo and no earplugs? God help him now. "No, she would have left us a marker or something. She's not that stupid. Let's keep going."  
  
So they walked...and walked some more. Duo's singing was horrible (you try listening to a "hip hop" version of the Christian song "Deep Down in my Heart"). About half a mile up the trail, they decided to turn back and see if they had missed the turn off. They hadn't—the only turn off was the one that was there before.  
  
"Duo, don't be an idiot. The trail branches off again right down there. She wouldn't make two turns without waiting for us or telling us where to go. She's probably just a bit past where we sat down, waiting on us."  
  
So the turned back and hiked back up the gravel road...for another mile. Duo was singing "This is the song that never ends" now, and Heero was losing hope of making it out of this week alive...or rather, with Duo alive. Around that time, they sat down and pondered what to do. They could keep going, or they could turn back and take their chances with the trail. They decided to take their chances, as the gravel road was really bad on their ankles.  
  
So they turned back and walked down the trail...which means they'd walked three miles back and forth, getting no where, really. They weren't to happy when about half a mile into the trail, they found Relena running back to meet them, a worried look on her face.  
  
"Where were you guys? We thought you were right behind us, and then you weren't!"  
  
"Relena, you turned off the goddamned trail and didn't let us know where you went! What do you expect us to do?" Duo was humming happily to himself. Heero was seriously regretting Relena's reasoning.  
  
--Flashback--  
  
"Heero, each of those guns has to weigh five to twenty pounds. You'll be carrying them for a week. Do you really want to bring them? Your pack's already heavy, and I'm not sure where you'd fit them." She had a good point...though Heero still couldn't see why it was okay to bring her make-up, but not his guns.  
  
--End Flashback--  
  
"Go down the trail. It was pretty obvious, you know."  
  
Heero rolled his eyes. "Come on. We're not going to make it to camp at this rate."  
  
And he was right. They didn't make camp. Well, no. That's not true. They did see a camp, but Relena insisted that it wasn't the right time. By the time night had fallen, they decided that it _had_ been the right one, but they weren't about to hike back uphill in the dark so they could set up tents in the dark and eat in the dark.  
  
So they decided to pitch camp...in the middle of the trail. First, the ground was uneven. Second, there was no actual cleared spot to set up the two tents they had. And third, it was dark by the time they started. So much for not setting up tents in the dark. A bunch of stubbed toes and two drooping tents later, they sat down to attempt dinner.  
  
However, this was harder than it sounded. First, they had never lit the burners before, and it turned out that lighting them was a task in themselves. Duo burned himself ("Don't cry. Crying is for weaklings. Shit! I just got burned! Damned stove!" muffled sounds of tears "No, dammit, I'm not crying! Leave me alone!"), and Trowa was pretty sure that he'd have a pretty bruise in the morning from where the stove had hit after Wufei threw it in a random direction.  
  
Relena put Quatre in charge of cooking, as he was probably the only one that could do it without getting burned, bruised or otherwise injured in any way. Too bad he was a horrible cook.  
  
"Quatre, this water has leaves in it...are you sure it's okay?"  
  
"Boiling the water should take away any of the germs on the leaves. No need to worry!" Heero believed Quatre's voice to be a bit too cheery.  
  
"Do you really think you should put the hot chocolate in the cup and then dip the cup into the water? All the hot coco powder's gonna get into the water."  
  
"Oh, it'll be okay."  
  
"But aren't you using that water to cook our rice and beans?"  
  
"Yes, I am." Quatre smiled jovially (or at least, Heero imagined he did—it was too dark to really be able to tell) and continued cooking.  
  
"Quatre, it's been a while...don't you think the rice and beans are cooked?"  
  
Quatre looked into the pot. "No, the ones on top are still not done." About a minute later they found that even though the top ones weren't done, the bottom ones were. And had been for about five minutes. And were now burned to the bottom of the pot.  
  
Needless to say, Heero hadn't particularly enjoyed his leaf-and-coco- flavored (and burnt) rice and beans. He decided that a healthy diet of bagels and fig newtons was in order...at least those wouldn't kill him.  
  
That night, they slept on a slope...and though Trowa had told him it would be best to sleep with their heads at the top of the slope, they decided to sleep parallel to it, which would be why Heero woke up with all the bodies that were uphill of him on top of him as a result of rolling downhill. Joy, joy, hallelujah.  
  
Once they had packed all their stuff back into their backpacks ("My makeup kit won't fit anymore! Where'd all my space go?"), they started hiking again. Little did they know that, though they had been going down hill the day before, they would now be going uphill. After half an hour of hiking up stairs, Heero was already sure that he never wanted to see another step in his entire life.  
  
They sat down for lunch around one o'clock, then started heading uphill again. This time, they went up...and up...and down a little! And the back up...and up some more...and damn, did the stairs ever go back down?  
  
Well, Heero found, they did go back down. But where as they had hiked about two and a half miles on a steep slope to get to the top of the mountain they were at now, they would now have to hike only a mile—straight down, at a nearly ninety degree angle, with no rests in between. At least the other part had had a couple of flat parts...from where he was now, though, Heero could see _all_ the way down to the ground...which wasn't all that comforting. And with Relena, the least balanced of them all, in the back, they were likely to all go tumbling with her when she fell.  
  
Heero started down, and after about twenty steps, he decided that it wasn't half bad. It could be worse...which, he found, it was. That was about the point in time that the hand-railing ended. A few steps later and he found that the steps that they had were now uneven. One step was about three inches in height, and the next came up to his waist. Not Heero's idea of a good staircase.  
  
Then they got to the oak tree. This step was about two and a half feet in height, and though there was a railing, it was about four feet to the right—too far away to be of any use what-so-ever. Anyone who tried to grab it would instead lose their balance and go tumbling off the cliff on the left side. The nearest thing to hold on to was an oak tree.  
  
After a few minutes of thinking, they made a chain from the oak tree that enabled Trowa to get down to the next step and help the others down afterwards. Relena still slipped, but all in all, they were pretty proud of themselves. They had just conquered what they believed to be the worst part.  
  
And luckily, it was. Other wise, they might have died.  
  
After another hour they reached the bottom of the steep climb down, and they took a break before hiking again. There were a couple more places that went down, but nothing as bad as the straight drop. This time, they made camp in time to actually see what they were cooking, and though Quatre wasn't allowed to do the cooking this time ("But guys, I can see now! I _promise_ I'll watch what I put in the food this time!"), and they had finally figured out how to use the burner, Heero still opted to eat his bagel instead. For good reason—Relena was doing the cooking this time.  
  
That night, they all sat down around the fire...and found that Trowa was sick, and had been all day, though he hadn't told any one. Relena's cooking was just the last straw, and his body finally refused to put up with it all. He had a fever and was puking out behind the tents when Quatre found him.  
  
So they decided that instead of finishing the hike (they had eleven miles to do the next day alone), they would take the trail that branched off a bit ahead, go into the neighboring park and call someone to pick them up.  
  
Too bad the trail that branched off went straight up immediately. Heero was beginning to dread going down hill—because that only meant that they would end up having to go back _uphill_ a little later. And uphill was not fun.  
  
The rest of the day passed with little incident. Wufei began complaining, which gave the idea to Duo that saying "Complaining is for weaklings" and "Suck it up, Wu-man" every time Wufei muttered something about "masochist bitches who seem to take pleasure in torturing their friends with hair- brained ideas." At least Duo had stopped singing "The song that gets on everybody's nerves" and "All Star" the previous day, and was currently silent...  
  
Which Heero found too good to be true when he started singing "Hey Ya'll" at the top of his lungs, to which he only knew the first verse and the chorus, which he kept repeating. That, and the multiple "alrights" in the song.  
  
The trail branched off again, and suddenly...it began to snow. "Well...this is perfect," muttered Wufei.  
  
"Awww, Wu-man, I'm sorry. I forgot you were deathly afraid of a challenge!" Duo started dancing around Wufei, singing about how Wufei couldn't take the challenge of a little snow. Heero was glad when Wufei knocked Duo out after a few seconds...even if that did mean that they had to wait around for Duo to wake up.  
  
The rest of the day went smoothly, much to Heero's relief. Well, as smoothly as it could go with a hyper-active and bored Duo, a tired Relena ("But I didn't think a make-up kit could make my pack _that_ heavy!"), an annoyed Wufei, an all-too-cheerful Quatre ("Look at the bright side—at least we're having fun!"), and a Trowa that hadn't said a word all morning.  
  
Finally they arrived at the end of the park...to find that the emergency cell phone they brought didn't work. So they all waited while Relena ran back and forth on the service road for the better part of two hours to find anything that related remotely to cell phone service.  
  
Finally one of the Raganaks (A/N: sorry if I spelled that wrong, I couldn't remember) was reached and they were picked up a lovely two hours (and chewy—yes chewy—pasta later) later.  
  
Ah, the joy of the wilderness. Heero knew one thing he'd never do again in his life.  
  
A/N: There's more, but I decided that the chapter would be far too long and annoying if I put it all in. I realize there's not much conversation and there's very little of annoying-Duo or anything remotely realistic in it, but that really did happen to me and a few others. I'm sorry if it wasn't as funny as you wanted it to be or anything. Please let me know what you think, especially in comparison to the other chapters...and man, I'm telling you. NEVER try to eat something you cooked in the dark. I think there were bugs in our rice and beans, too. And those stairs went STRAIGHT down. Other things that happened? We nearly burned down the forest, Jessie was everyone's bathroom buddy and we got lost...again. I swear, NEVER give your shrink the map. Yes, the shrink. She was our "guide" who "knew" what she was doing because she had been on the trail before. "So how does that make you feel?" came out of her mouth in that shrink-y voice all shrinks have every five minutes. R&R, please. I have more ideas for chapters, but right now my brother is yelling at me to get off so he can get on the computer, so they'll have to wait. Ttfn. Aren't you glad I finally updated this? 


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